A moment of critical self-assessment

Maybe it is the poor weather we have been having this week, but I have had a rather depressing, introspective time.

It started when someone – I think Joanna Blythman – asked me what political activities I was involved in now, and I replied ‘none’.  OK, I suppose I have an excuse: local politics here are such rubbish, and not my rubbish, that it is difficult to participate.  Equally, I may rant and fume about the Tories, Israel, the American lunatic right, to name just a few, but again there is little I can do here.

Well, there is: I could read more so I could argue my corner with authority should the occasion rise (for example, with a Zionist ‘friend’ on Facebook).  I should also become better informed on French politics, even though these are almost as depressing!

I don’t have the excuse that many women of my age have that they are busy helping out with grandchildren.  I do indeed feel guilty about this – thank goodness my sister, Deb, does this in my place.  But realistically, even if I were in England, my health issues would prevent most practical help.  I’m so glad that we can use FaceTime and Skype to at least have the pleasure of watching the grandchildren grow – and giving them a chance to know that Granny is still around.

Talking to Janet Pressley today – her son Jonathan and partner have just had a baby boy – she admitted that she is not really into cuddling babies and  has only recently begun enjoying grandmother duties, now that her granddaughter, Laura, has reached the chatting stage.  In my case, Maddie is the cuddliest of the four grandchildren, but the other three have the distinct advantage that I can now talk to them!

In the market today various people asked how my shoulder was doing.  I try to be cheery and positive, because it is so boring when people become obsessed with health problems.  The fact is that not only is my shoulder making slow progress, but it is increasingly clear to me that my first hip replacement is living on borrowed time. The prospect of a hip replacement-replacement looms, probably for the winter, and the planned return to India recedes further into the future.

However, on a brighter note, I have used the bad weather to continue work on my website, using more manageable software tools of WordPress and jAlbum. I have just completed the sections on my two trips to India (under the Travel section).  This has taken a long time, as I stopped frequently to read my diaries and look at old photos again.  A very pleasurable experience.